I'm so weak it is a major effort to type so if I make some mistakes please forgive me. She did it again and this time she almost succeeeded to kill me. I don't even know where to start, all I can tell you that it's been hell.
I am sick as a dog (excuse the pun) actually I am a dog and I am sick sick sick. It's my tummy I have the "runs" as humiliating as that is to write about but yes sir I have the shits to put it bluntly. She almost took me to the doctors to torture me further but decided that she would wait until I was almost dead. First my brother had the problem and yes he pooped all over and my human brother even stepped in it late at night. I laughed my head off but as you know payback's a bitch. The next thing I know I have it.
I pooped all over the house the runny kind that I managed to scatter all around. It was hell, I lost my appetite and was lethargic and just generally sick. SHe was all pissed at ME! If you can believe that. SHe was blaming me for pooping on the carpet. Well I am a dog and I can't reach the toilet! And besides the carpet is much nicer on my tender little paws. After all I am sick!
Then I find out what the problem was......SHebought CAT food instead of DOG food. Dry kibble type of CAT food that both my brother and I hated and refused to eat. Do you know what SHe did? SHe mixed it up with some delicious turkey breast meat so we were forced to eat it. I knew it SHe has been trying torture me from the very beginning and now I have proof!
SHe claims that SHe did not notice until now, what is she blind? The bag had a cat drawing and feline written all over it for goodness sake. The only consolation I have is that SHe had to clean up the mess. (payback's a bitch) First thing in the morning poop all over it was great! SHe was gagging! And as weak as I was I laughed and giggled as she scrubbed and sprayed and washed and cursed.
So that is how my thanksgiving holiday was, I am thankful to be alive! I do feel much better now I sent her to get new food my favorite kind this time and all is much better but it will take some time for me to forgive her for this one. I will figure out ways to get back at her I always do. I've got to go now I need my rest.
ps. The Boy is still sleeping so he is not able to write anything but I'm sure I have him convinced that "Mommie" is really "Mommie Dearest".
These little dog posts crack me up! I have missed the Boy and the Bitch. I hope they have recovered (and you, too) I totally sympathize with the clean-up problem as I have a bulemic cat.
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