More notes from the Bitch:
She does not think that I know what she is up to, I can tell by the shoes she is wearing where she is going. At home she wears casual "at home shoes". She sometimes tries to fool me with this one but I know I'm also telapathic.
By looking at her feet after all I am "height challenged" but the shoes are the easiest way for me to judge weather she is leaving the compound or just going outside or lounging around.
The shoes always gives it away, and when she starts spraying her hair then I know for sure she is going to get in the car and leave. But she always comes back, as much as I enjoy my private time at home I kind of miss her and I do get excited to see if she brought back some food!
The fool that I am I keep thinking that this time she may have brought back something that I actually like. None of that "Organic" crap, I like chemicals! I have tried to explain to her that those "Birkenstock Sandal Wearing" Organic bunch hanging out at the Co-Op have horrible food! Again you can tell a lot about what shoes people wear.
Think about it, yes I always judge a person by their shoes! That saying that you can't judge a book by the cover is just silly. I say you can judge a person by the shoes they are wearing.
But I digress, I was talking about that tasteless food she gets me at the "Health Food" store, sometimes they even have tofu in them! I am not a Vegetarian for goodness sake, stop with vegan crap. I'm embarressed that she calls them a chewey. What is wrong with the good old Pig's ear that I love, or some of those stinky animal products they sell at the pet store. I am a Pet you know.
I confess my all time favorites are the Greenies. I looove the greenies, I pray she will bring home some greenies.
The Queen Bitch.
Now from the boy:
I love everything mommy brings home and gives me. She must love me very much to go out of her way to get Organic food for me. She even goes to that weird store to get special treats that have no nasty chemicals in them. Oooh I'm so lucky.
Non Organic Dog Treats